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Sex, Good Love

Getting Your Butt Ready For Butt Stuff

Goodfeedstaff founding_member

Jean-Dominique Ingres, Odalisque

Class is in session.

Stacey_Leigh

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One of the biggest things that made me anxious about anal sex was getting comfortable with the hygiene of it. I had a fear of being unclean and I was getting way too in my head about it. Among anal sex aficionados, feelings about adequate prep work are all over the map. Some swear by a deep cleaning ritual, some don’t ever feel the need, and others fall somewhere in between.

To answer the Big Question: will there be poop? I mean, for the most part, no. You generally have an idea of when you’re, ya know, occupied or not. Unless you’ve got a health issue, you’re not walking around with one in the chamber at all times. But a little prep work can take you from fine to squeaky clean and ready for basic anal play.

Choose Your Weapon

The good news is that anal douching has a very easy entry point. (Purchase wise, we’ll get into the other point of entry later.) The bulb-shaped douches go for around $7-10 online or at a sex shop and they are really all you need.

If you’re looking online, you’ll also see some super expensive shower nozzles and high priced gadgets. Don’t worry about those for now— for a beginner, the bulb is all you need.

You’ve probably also seen enemas at the drug store. Fleet is the most common name brand. I’d caution you to stay away from these for now because those are designed to clean into your lower intestine, beyond the reach of the butt chamber we’re working with. (More on that later.)

Get Ready

You’ll want to be near your sink and toilet for reasons that should be pretty obvious. If you aren’t douching daily, normal tap water is fine. Open up the bulb and fill it to the brim with lukewarm water. Your internal skin is very sensitive, so you want to go quite a bit cooler than the temperature you’d use to shower.

Insert and Squeeze

The next step, we’re putting that nozzle right on up there. Personally, I find it easier to insert in the shower, standing under some hot water. When you’re starting out, try inserting a finger into your sphincter first to relax it, since your finger is softer than the nozzle. Some people also use lube on the tip of the nozzle. Whichever way works for you, stick the pencil-width size nozzle in and gently press it up inside.

Give the bulb a squeeze and you’ll feel a rush of water filling you up. Congratulations! You’ve done the hardest part.

Shake It Up

From here, you want the water to move around a bit. Some people swear by doing little hops. You can also use this time to shave your legs which will end up moving the water. Somewhere between immediately to a few minutes after, you’ll get the sense of really needing to go.

Sit yourself down on the toilet and expel that water out. It might take a few goes for the waters to run clear. That is totally normal. Just rise and repeat until you’re comfortable with it.

Tips and Tricks

While the majority of water will come out as you push, give yourself a little extra time. You might find that you’ve got a surprise reserve of water up there a few minutes afterward, so don’t wander too far off for the next 10-15 minutes.

Also, it turns out, making things worse with douching is easier than you’d think. If you get extra zealous, you can irrigate your sigmoid colon, which will encourage things to flow freely south and give you a watery, bloated feeling. This is definitely not what you want and why the bulbs are a better pre-sex solution than a whole ass enema. Stick to the amount in the bulb or a little less until you get the hang of your own volume.

Make Friends with Fiber

Honestly, the best thing you can do for “set it and forget it” butt stuff? A healthy diet that includes soluble fibers like fruits, vegetables, legumes, and oat bran. Try to avoid or go light on dairy, red meats, alcohol, and fatty foods for a day or two beforehand. This will keep your digestive health at its best and can even eliminate the need for douching for some folks.

The After Clean

It’s a butt and it’s always going to be a butt. Even with your prep work, your partner should always thoroughly wash their penis, fingers, or toys that have been in your butt. Definitely always do this before putting that same penis/finger/toy into your mouth or vagina. There’s nothing special on that end; just lather it up with some soap and water and it’s good to go.

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